At first I thought it was scary. I suddenly had all these responsibilities and all these privileges, I hardly knew what to do. But it’s also really exciting. Childhood is over and, while I still have many mistakes left to make, my life is really just starting.
And since music really speaks to me, I decided to share this playlist I made a while back with a few songs that describe the mixed feelings about adulthood that I’ve had this past year.
Here’s the playlist, and if you scroll down, I wrote down the reasons that I put each song on the playlist.
College Kids by Relient K–I added this song to the playlist when I was feeling a lot of pressure from my family (and myself) to start my college education even though I wasn’t 100% certain of what I wanted to do.
Stressed Out by Twenty One Pilots--of course there’s a tøp song I really identified with this song a couple months back when adulthood was looming but not quite here yet. I just wanted to be a kid again.
Hall of Fame by The Script–“you can be the greatest, you can be the best…” I like the theme of this song, telling you that you can be anything.
The Middle by Jimmy Eat World–This has always been one of my favorites, but the line “just be yourself, it doesn’t matter if it’s good enough for someone else” describes the lesson I’ve learned that I have to be my own person and not live up to other’s expectations. .
Back Home by Owl City–I may be taking a new path, but I do have a home, whether it be a physical building, the people who are close to me, or the memories that will always stay with me.
House of Gold by Twenty One Pilots–this song just makes me feel happy, though it’s a little sad if you pay attention to the lyrics.
It’s Not Right for You by The Script–“you’ve got one life to love what you do” This inspired me when I decided what I wanted to study for college.
On Top of the World by Imagine Dragons–this past year has been a high point and this song makes me feel like it’s never going to end.
Best Day of My Life by American Authors–this song is my happy song. I️ hear it once and the rest of my day cannot be ruined.
Luck by American Authors–this song also makes me happy, and reminds me that I don’t have to do what everyone wants me to do.
Welcome to My Life by Simple Plan–once again, a happy sounding song that’s kinda depressing. I’m not 100% certain why I added this song.
The Nights by Avicii–This song encourages me to live while I’m young, cause I don’t want to have regrets when I’m older.
I will continue to add to this playlist and listen to it when I’m feeling down or stressed out. Ha. twenty one pilots reference. And I hope it can provide some encouragement to the rest of you out there.
Now for the third songfiction. This is based off of the song “Steady as She Goes”, the third song on Sky Sailing’s album “An Airplane Carried Me to Bed”. Despite my dislike for first person present tense, I figured this one would sound best in that style.
Anyway, read it (if you dare), and I will be back in a few days!
I wake up at daybreak, my alarm clock going off beside my bed. My eyes open with a start, even though my body is a tad slower. Dust motes float in the golden beam of sunlight peeking beneath the ragged blinds of the only window in my room. I grin in anticipation as I realize what today is. Excitement pulls me out of that bed. I don’t bother making it. I have no need for it.
No more nightmares. Sweet dreams for as long as I can foresee. Storms are turning to fair weather.
I load my bags into the trunk of my car, completely forgetting to eat breakfast. I had left everything I knew behind, chasing vain dreams: a voyage that had left me stranded, but finally, I am returning. The ship is returning to port, fresh breezes pulling at twice mended sails, stale ropes creaking, but alive with the promise of the return. Life has thrown so much at me, yet here I am: still alive.
Taking a deep breath, I start the car and pull out of the driveway. All my belongings are packed in the trunk and I am ready to never see this old apartment again. I turn the radio on and the long highway stretches out before me towards the horizon. As the song that I hardly recognize fills up my ears, my mind turns towards the friends and family who are anticipating my return.
Rachel is back home waiting for me. The thought of her brings a smile to my lips. It is barely morning, the sun still not fully suspended in the sky. long shadows are falling away to the west, pointing my way back home, but she is most likely awake and worrying about my safety. I hope her thoughts are on me even as mine are on her.
On the passenger seat, propped against one of my bags, I had placed the book she had let me borrow last time I visited. I had enjoyed it, even if the only reason I had done so was because she had recommended it. i can not recall the plot line of the book, only that I had thought of her with every turning of the page.
Next to the book, spilling out of the broken zipper of my backpack, is a picture in a simple wooden frame that is more valuable to me than anything. I am standing next to a young woman wearing a graduation cap and gown, holding her diploma above a radiant smile. Sarah had just made her debut on stage, fulfilling her dreams of being an actress on Broadway. This will be my first time seeing my little sister since then. I am so proud of her, and have looked forward to seeing her ever since. We had encouraged her, her angelic voice filling up our home as she practiced, the voice that will fill many theaters in the years to come. Our parents had mailed me a letter filled with newspaper clippings, and I knew we were not the only ones who believed her to be the best. I wonder where both of us would have been without our parents’ encouragement.
If it wasn’t for them, I wouldn’t be coming back.
My thoughts are elsewhere, but I leave my concentration on the road as the radio plays song after song that I can barely distinguish over the sound of the tires eating up the distance between here and there. I sign proclaims my passing from one state to the next. One less state line between me and those I love. They are always in my heart, and even if I do not tell them that enough, it is one of my most recurring thoughts.
A memory flashes behind my eyes of Rachel and me. We had taken a walk once over the beach, the crashing waves crowned with white, drowning out the words we were trying to say to each other. So we looked into each other’s eyes and kept our thoughts to ourselves. We would try to read each other’s minds (with unsuccessful results), but there is one thing she knows. I’m dying to see her again.
The sun rises and sets over my journey, and I soon see a long familiar country road. i new chapter of my life is starting and I am on my way to a better life, although I do not know what lies out there. This ship might be putting into port, but it is about to head out again on a grander adventure. The seas can change, the tides will turn, but so long as she remains steady, the ship can handle anything.
Hello and welcome to my second songfiction! If you don’t know what a songfic is, I explained it in my previous post, and if that didn’t help anything, maybe google it or leave a comment that I will get to in a week and three days when I get back from my “vacation”.
Titled “Brielle” this is the second song off of the album “An Airplane Carried Me to Bed” by Sky Sailing of which Captains of the Sky is the first song (seeing a pattern here yet…hm?)
He lifted his pen from the paper, thinking about the words he was trying to write. There was so much he wanted to say. So much he couldn’t say. So much he was scared to say.
He sighed and looked at the blank page before him with eyes brimming with tears. Why had he waited so long to write?
He picked up the small photograph that sat next to the letter, on the crate he was using as a table. Bringing it close, he saw the familiar face of Brielle.
I am sailing away, recalling that day miles from shore…
It had been the last time he saw her. They had been young, and carefree…He had teased her about her dress. It was an old thing, white and robin’s egg blue, and had belonged to her grandmother. She wore it in the picture, the muted colors white under the glare of the sun. If he cupped his hand over the small photo, he was able to see her face. Her dark locks framed her heart shaped face and her beautiful sea green eyes stared at him, creased in laughter.
Finally, he knew what to say.
Only whispers can tell of the sweet dreams that we knew so well…
They had spent many hours together, before he had left on this seemingly endless journey. As the ship swayed beneath him on the rolling waves, he wrote, reminding her of all they had said. Sharing their dreams. Sharing their memories. Planning their future.
The frozen days we set ablaze send me drifting away…
Before she had come, he had felt so alone. His days were colorless and meaningless. He trudged from one pointless day to the next. There were so many dark thoughts he had had in those desolate nights, those frozen days where he felt numb. Then Brielle came along, bringing a splash of color; melting his heart and giving him a reason to live.
Like a butterfly you floated by and now you’re alone…
How much he wished he had not left. Wanting to see the world, he had enlisted, not knowing that a certain girl would steal his heart weeks before he had to leave. Like a butterfly, his heart beat for her. He had asked her to come along, but she told him no. He continued writing, finally sealing the letter with a promise.I’ll sail home again…
Strolling over the sand and cobblestone paths that wind through the trees…
The ship sailed into port, giving the sailors a respite from the rollicking wind and waves. The letter was sealed, and the sailor was the first to step off the vessel, his feet meeting the cobblestone paths of the small village built near the sand, on the edge of a forest. It reminded him of a place so familiar, but yet so different. Born for the sea in an oceanside village similar to this one, he had naturally felt the call of strange lands. But now, how he wound up here was anyone’s guess.
Breathing the sweet forest air makes the bluebird aware that she could be free…
He strolled across the sandy dunes towards the forest. A bird fluttered and chirped overhead. He smelled it too. The sweet aroma of pines, once again reminding him of home, and of the freedom he had desired. A gust of wind pushed at his back, hastening his steps. The same bird he had heard overhead swooped down in a flash of blue plumage. He held out the letter and the small songbird took it, flying off into the breeze.
I wish I knew when I’ll be back again…
He waited until he could no longer see the bird. Only then did he return to the village and his voyage. He was beginning to count the months and days until his service was over. Adventure was beginning to lose its flavor, reminding him that soon he would be able to return home.
But until then I wish you well…
The ship sailed away–off towards another destination, led by the untraceable tides of wind and time, fueled by adventure. The sailor stood upon the prow of the boat, scanning the watery horizon for a sign of land, his dark hair blowing in the breeze.
So until then I wish you well…
He thought of Brielle. He wished her all the happiness in the world…and all the hope. Hope was what they needed as they waited see each other again. Inhaling a breath made of salt and breeze, he sighed into the wind. Echoing the closing line of his letter, a statement he had made many times before but was only just beginning to mean, he whispered towards home…
I love you my darling, farewell…
The sun set, dousing the world in darkness but for the stars and the moon, newly reborn. They shone down upon the faces of two lovers separated by seas, continents, and time—but united, if only by something as small as hope.
There’s a handwritten note pressed in the door of her screened in porch…
Well, what did you think?
this is my favorite of my songfics, but don’t tell the rest that because then they’ll think I’m showing favoritism
Today I shall be sharing a songfiction (a short story based off of a song) with all of you. Titled “Captains of the Sky” this is based off of the song “Captains of the Sky” by Sky Sailing (aka Owl City aka Adam Young).
It’s a good song, you should listen to it and then read my songfic 🙂
The sun rose bright and early, setting the world into motion, and the boy awoke with it, flinging himself out of bed. Dashing to the window, he saw the fields across the street and inhaled, feeling his heart beginning to race. The light had not yet banished the shadows from his small room. The silhouettes of model airplanes danced on the green papered wall. Not taking the time to change out of his pajamas, he grabbed the few things he needed, and flew down the steps, nearly falling before he grabbed the railing.
Slamming doors and fleeing feet brought him to her house. She was waiting for him in her driveway, clothed in her pajamas. Having just woken up herself, her face was bright as it reflected the rosy rays of the sun. “Look!” the boy exclaimed, pointing upwards breathlessly.
The girl followed his gaze, her mouth open wide in amazement. Sailboats flew through the air far overhead. “That’s where your dad is?”
The boy nodded vigorously. “I’m going to join him up there!” He dashed away before the girl knew what he was doing and grabbed her bike. The girl stared at him as as he strapped on his helmet and goggles, which he had grabbed from his room. “Ben!” she cried in alarm as he put his hands on the handlebars and his feet to the pedals. “What are you doing?”
“There’s magic in the air, can’t you feel it?” he whispered, pausing momentarily, but before she could respond he took off. In moments he was airborne, the bicycle propelled with what could only be magic. His laughter rang throughout the valley. The girl dashed to the end of the driveway, not wishing to be left behind. He remained in the air for only a short amount of time before he came back, pedals whirling.
Smiling, he held his hand out to her, the bike hovering only inches from the blades of grass. Nervous, but not willing to be scared, she took his hand and squealed as he ascended into the sky with her in his arms. The cool summer wind stung her cheeks, filling her lungs with the smell of pine and the taste of lemon. Her short brown hair flew behind her, tickling the boy’s freckled nose. Below them, the town, like a map, spread out for miles in all directions. It was impossible to tell which houses were their own as they looked down upon the roofs.
Pedaling faster, the boy propelled them into the nearest cloud. Delightedly, the girl took handfuls of the clouds, and blew, spreading the fluffy substance around, small bits coming to land on her nose and in her hair, dampening them with the water inside. She turned around to see the boy, ready to throw some cloud into his face, but she found he was no longer on the bike. “Ben!”
“I’m building a hangar!” he replied. She saw that he was in the cloud right below hers, molding the clouds with his hands and his breath, creating a runway. Laughing, she fitted her feet to the pedals, brought the bike down next to him, and began to help. Above, the sailboats and airplanes continued to soar, not knowing of the two children who had just discovered the magic of flight.
This was not the first time the two friends had attempted to fly. The first time was a long time ago, at the beginning of their friendship. Ben had shown her his room, and proceeded to fold a paper airplane that matched one of his models. “I can fly too,” he bragged after throwing the paper plane across the room, watching it soar across invisible air currents, finally taking flight out of the window and into the sky. “Will you try with me?” he asked, and she had decided to come.
Standing at the top of the staircase, they both jumped, following his instructions. They were airborne for a moment, several moments which gave her the hope that they might just be able to soar right out of the front door and follow the airplane, but it was only a second before they crashed to the kitchen floor, their moment of triumph crushed, but she knew Ben never gave up hope that he could fly again someday. He practiced every day since then, trying to jump off various tall items, or riding his bike as fast as he could down the road, like an airplane down a runway. He chased every strand of magic in the hope that it would bring him his dream, but to no avail. Not until today.
Now the two of them were airborne, blowing the clouds around their hangar. The girl took the bike back down to her house, slipped in through her bedroom window, and grabbed a ream of paper. They spent that sweet summer afternoon sitting on a cloud, folding paper airplanes which they sent off into the distance. They whispered words into them, hoping the strangers who received them would be encouraged by them when they found the small planes sitting on the back porch or the windowsill.
Night descended and they had no intentions of returning home. The cloud had taken them across the valley, and the new view showed them the mountains that were no longer purple. Now they could see the trees growing upon the rocky slopes and the flocks of birds soaring beneath them.
Birds flocked to their hangar. Ben, in a spirit of recklessness decided he was going to join them. The girl barely protested, and watched from the edge of the cloud as he jumped into the air, a mile from the ground, and soared with the birds, his arms outstretched, touching the bright blue wings of the birds beside him. In minutes, he had her joining him, laughing together as the currents of wind took them across the sky, silhouetted against the stars. Soaring up and up, the girl felt certain she could touch them. “I’ll get you one,” Ben promised, almost reading her mind.
He spread his arms like wings and soared higher, his hands folding around a tiny diamond of light, plucking it from the expansive garden of night. Flying back, he presented his gift to the girl. It was no bigger than a daisy, and shaped just like one. She tucked it in her hair and they returned to the cloud.
The morning dawned, the birds flew high, and joined them on their cloud, lifting their voices in song—a beautiful song that the children echoed with their voices. Crawling to the edge of the cloud on their stomachs, they found they were just above their street. They saw their mothers in their yards, and they waved at them. “We should go back down,” she told him.
Ben was in the middle of folding an airplane, his hands frozen upon the center fold. His eyes were looking into the sky. “I’d rather be here,” he told her.
She placed a hand on his. “We’re captains of the sky now. We can come up here whenever we want.”
Giving a sigh of agreement, he took the last piece of paper and folded it meticulously. He whispered in it a soft message, meant for only one person, and sent it off into the sky. It flew up and up into the mass of ships. The magic that had befriended the two children took it exactly where it needed to go.
As the last of the ships passed the horizon, a bicycle carried a boy and a girl down to the ground, to the embraces of their mothers, and a father received a message, wishing him well upon his adventure.
So, I hope you all liked that!
Let me know in the comments if you enjoyed and you want me to post my other songfics (there’s more where this came from). Though you don’t have a choice. Muahaha
Today I leave to go work on support staff at White Sulpher Springs for two weeks (Well, a little more than that). I will be gone until the 24th, and therefore will not be responding to comments or any other type of internet fueled communication. I will be posting more songfics over the next few weeks (yay for scheduling), so look forward to those 🙂
I used to love shopping, but recently I have begun to despise it because it takes too much time; time that I could be spending writing or thinking about writing or another method of procrastination.
But, over the course of the last month or so, I have been shopping a few times and I discovered two stores that I really wish I had encountered a while ago.
Just like with my previous post, Two Amazing Things I Discovered This Week, everyone is probably aware of these stores’ existence, most likely have been there a couple of times, and it’s just me who is uncultured because I never go shopping.
So the first store I discovered was Hot Topic. I had heard about it, mostly on the internet, though one friend had recommended it to me.
My sister decided to go to the mall and I came along, packing a book or two just to make sure I wasn’t bored. It must have been May 2nd because that’s when I started reading Paper Towns. She was looking for a dress. I was looking for something anything that was less than ten dollars (no luck there). The mall is just too dang expensive and I don’t understand why girls would even want to wear half the stuff I saw.
Then, as we were walking around Abercrombie and Fitch or Aeropostale or <insert clothing store name that starts with an “A”>, I happened to see Hot Topic just down the hall. I went in, passing a rack of graphic tees and tanks, the one on the front saying “Panic! At the Disco”, and fell in love.
There was Harry Potter merch in the front of the store: Hogwarts house tanks, Fantastic Beasts necklaces, mugs, pants, and other things. Then I soon found the Doctor Who section, and in the very back there were the band tees. I couldn’t decide which Twenty One Pilots shirt I preferred (there were maybe five styles). The interior was dark and small and they played “Death of a Bachelor”, among other songs that you never hear on the radio. I eventually had to leave, but I returned and finally decided on and bought a TØP shirt.
The second store I discovered was Barnes and Noble. I went there on Mother’s Day with a friend. I absolutely loved walking in and seeing all the books. I know a lot of people talk about smelling books, but I honestly don’t think that books have a smell. Sorry for being a bad bookworm
I wanted to sit there all day and just read all the books. Maybe buy one or two. In the end I bought a book, Made You Up, because I decided to indulge myself instead of doing the usual two hours of research and finding references before I make a purchase. I finally read it two days ago. It was pretty good and from what I understand is a good representation of schizophrenia, not to mention that the cover is beautiful. I did write a review on it, but it’s not all that great because I only spent fifteen minutes on it before I had to leave for work. And….just a little thing that made me happy….on the receipt, they had a list of books that you might like if you enjoyed the book you bought. I’m hanging onto it with the plans of eventually checking out those other books.
And the bags have the first lines of classic novels and beautiful black and white illustrations.
So, now I shall end this post saying that I am no longer fully uncultured and that I shall look forward to going shopping again at these stores.
I AM NO LONGER FULLY UNCULTURED AND I LOOK FORWARD TO SHOPPING AGAIN
Thank you for reading, wonderful person.
Let me know if there’s another fandom or bookish store that I should check out.
So I realised I haven’t written anything in two weeks….whoops.
What have I been doing in this absence?
Well, not writing for one.
I spent a good amount of time stressing about my exam for my psychology class, but I passed my exam with an A. Yay! First college exam passed, umpteen more to go…
Then, I started orientation for my new job at Chick-fil-A, which was a week long process, and tomorrow I go in for my first day of work where I will be trained on service. Also, I spent a good amount of time trying to figure out how to hem my uniform pants which came a little too long for me. I spent nearly all afternoon accomplishing that task because my sister (who is the sewing expert) is in Oklahoma right now visiting our cousins.
Speaking of Vick, it’s very nice to have our room all to myself so I can make a mess and not get yelled at. 🙂
Okay, okay. I’m not making that big of a mess. Currently, most of the mess is me rearranging my closet. It’s a very time consuming process involving me rereading old writing (which includes explosive laughter*, embarrassment, and a lot of nostalgia), throwing bucket loads of stuff away (literally), and making “coming of the closet” jokes every time I have to leave to stretch my legs.
Cleaning the closet also gave the opportunity to listen to a lot of music. I tend to listen to it as an album since James (my iPod) doesn’t have an auto play feature on YouTube and can’t download Pandora or Spotify. So far I have listened to: “No Sound Without Silence” by The Script (10/10. Fav song: Superheroes), “How to Save a Life” by The Fray (8/10. Fav song: How to Save a Life), “Blurryface” by Twenty One Pilots (11/10. Fav Song: all of them), “Vessel” by Twenty One Pilots (12/10. Fav song: Guns For Hands and basically all of them), “Vices and Virtues” by Panic! at the Disco (9/10. I’m a P!atD fan by osmosis**. Fav song: House of Memories or Always You (or whatever it’s called))
I also happened to rearrange my bookshelf and discovered I own over 100 books (but I want more…), which makes me feel accomplished as a bookworm. 😀
Yesterday was Pi Day, renamed by me as Pie Day. So, I made Pie. I spent the evening on monday making an apple and lemon merengue pie (I also learned how to spell merengue as I texted my sister for the recipe), and know why I’m in service and not in culinary for my new job because I have terrible cooking habits. We had the apple pie for breakfast, then went outside to shovel the ten inches or so of snow we got the night before. Then for lunch we had chicken pot pie, and supper consisted of shepherd’s pie and the lemon merengue pie. And nobody celebrated pi. We just celebrated pie for it is worthy.
Also, an interesting realisation I had: so this week is spring break at the college I am taking my psychology class at, and it also happens to be the only week it really snows in our area. Confusing much?
Yep. So that is what I have been up to. Nothing too important. Just rambling. I’m hoping on posting some writing in the next week, but no promises.
See ya’ll later!
*I accidentally tore a page out of a notebook by laughing so hard. **It happens when you are stuck in a car with your Panic! obsessed friend and they just got four of their albums for christmas and therefore that’s the soundtrack for the entire car ride.
I’m fairly certain everyone listens to music. You know what it is, and probably have a favorite band if not a favorite song (or songs), unless the rock you live under is a lot bigger than mine.
I LOVE music. Now, if you narrow it down, I’m a little more picky. Such as, I don’t like country or rap (although Christian rap is okay), and don’t like listening to classical (playing it is a different matter), and don’t like songs with bad words or “stuff” in them. So, (to talk about what I do like) I like songs with words (and a lot of songs without words, like movie soundtracks and I don’t even know genres, people) and especially like them when the lyrics are deep (and sometimes depressing, although that’s not a must).
Now, to get to my point (yes, there is one): there is a song that really speaks to me in my life right now. To be truthful, there are a lot of songs that do, but this is the one at the front of my brain, and I don’t have to do deep soul-searching for (although that would be fun?).
Before I eventually get to the song in question, I hope you all have heard of Relient K. If you haven’t, we can’t be friends until you listen to at least three (or all?) of their songs and form your honest opinion (we can still be friends if you hate them, just not best friends), and if you have heard of them (and consequently like them), let me know so I can be happy:D
So, the song is “College Kids” by Relient K. This song, if you look at the lyrics, is definitely about kids in the college life (and therefore doesn’t apply to me), but some stanzas form my current motto when people ask me what I’m going to do with my life after I graduate.
Someone please save us, us college kids!
What my parents told me is what I did.
They said go to school and be a college kid,
But in the end I question why I did.
And that’s why I say
Oh no! Not for me, not for me.
Call it torture, call it university.
No! Arts and crafts is all I need.
I’ll take calligraphy and then I’ll make a fake degree.
The reason why this speaks to me:
I do want to go to college, but I’m not entirely certain of what I will do yet. I don’t want to go because my society tells me to (there actually isn’t that much pressure from my mom) and then hate myself if I realise I made a mistake. I don’t feel like I’m ready, and I’m trying to take this one hurdle at a time. First: the scary reality that I will be seventeen in two days. Second: I’m graduating *mental screaming*. Third: *insane mental screaming because someone mentioned college*
Do what will make God happy.
Do what you feel is right.
Only but one thing matters,
Learn how to live your life.